Guest Post by Ploni
I believe that there are several solid reasons why in our
case there is absolutely no צד whatsoever to allow a Posek
to rely on what he was told. My hope is that this comment
will be מעורר Talmidei Chachomim to be מעיין בדין זה עד
שיצא לאורה. At the end of the comment, please see several
מקורות on which this comment is based
לפענ"ד the whole question of being able to rely on what a
שואל relates to a Posek without fact checking would ע"פ
דינא דשו"ע not apply here for several reasons:
1) The נידון here is at the very least one of דיני ממונות
(assuming RMF's comparison to מקח טעות). The possible
exclusion from due diligence is only by איסורים. This
would mandate that the Psak should be בפני בעל דין,
meaning AF.
2) The נידון here is a question of being פוגם בכבודו
ובכבוד אבותיו of AF. The possible exclusion from due
diligence even by איסורים is only when nobody's כבוד is
נפגם. This would also mandate that the Psak should be בפני
בעל דין, meaning AF.
3) the נידון here is one of a דין מרומה - There were and
remain now many "red flags" about the involvement of
certain people, the fact that the diagnosis wasn't brought
up earlier, contradictions to TE's testimony and diary
notes, etc. The possible exclusion from due diligence even
by איסורים like עגונה is only when there is no חשש דין
מרומה. This also mandates that the Psak should be בפני בעל
דין, meaning AF. Additionally, this would mandate דרישה
וחקירה, and according to many (and perhaps most) Poskim
"pleading the fifth" or saying "I don't know" (which is
happening בנידון דידן) would of itself be a reason לבטל
הדין.
4) Furthermore, if we take the stance of those Rabbonim
who believe that the הפקעת קידושין is in error, but that
AF nevertheless has a חיוב לגרש (like the YU Rabbonim and
Roshei Yeshivos and many in Silver Spring), there seems to
be a fourth issue here: the נידון here is one of לאסור אשה
לבעלה, since by virtue of this Psak TE is now אסורה לבעלה.
The possible exclusion from due diligence even by איסורים
is only where there is no question לאוסרה על בעלה, which
according to most Poskim would require both בפני בעל דין
and also דרישה וחקירה, as mention in paragraph. #3.
The aforementioned is לפענ"ד in large measure the result
of a single but terrible mistake arising from a mistaken
belief in the VALIDITY of psychological diagnosis.
Everyone here agrees that the linchpin of נידון דידן
depends on a DSM diagnosis, and the defense of the מתירים
is (as RNG said) the belief that the psychologist's report
is exactly like any matter where medical professionals
have נאמנות. Under this assumption, psychology is like
other areas of medicine, where certain illnesses can be
diagnosed without ever meeting the patient. Had this
belief been correct, many of the aforementioned problems
might possibly not have applied.
It has, however, become abundantly clear from the very
most authoritative sources in psychology, including from
the architect of the DSM themselves, that forensic
evaluations are extremely subjective and therefore require
a whole slew of safeguards in order to be acceptable.
THERE ARE ABSOLUTELY NO DISSENTERS TO THIS FACT IN THE
UPPER ECHELONS OF THE FIELD , although clinicians vey
often ignore it. See, for example the posts at: http://daattorah.blogspot.com/...
and
Especially enlightening is the four published papers
(links at the "secular evaluations post) regarding the six
most important question in psychology, in which TWENTY
FIVE of the top experts in the field participated, and not
a single one attempted to equate psychology to objective
medicine.
Therefore, ANY possible היתר to continue without קבלת
עדות לפני הבעל דין and without דרישה וחקירה are extremely
questionable, to say the least.
מקורות - כמובן רק מעט מזעיר ....
א) בדין קבלת עדות בדיני ממונות שלא בפני בע"ד, ע' חו"מ ס'
כ"ח סט"ו, שאם קבלו אין דנים על פיו לדעת הב"י בשם רבי מנחם
וכן הוא במהרש"ל, אמנם לדעת ר"י ומרדכי כשר בדיעבד. ולפי
הכרעת המהרא"י דוקא בגבר אלם שא"א בענין אחר מקבלין, ופשוט
שטעם זה אין שייך כאן בנד"ד. (וודאי יהי' כאלו שירצו לתרץ
מטעם מש"כ ברמ"א שבקטטות ומריבות מותר כדי להשקיט המריבה,
אבל כבר דן בזה המהרש"ל בנידון הדומה לשלנו שעושים ההיפוך
ומרבים מחלוקות, ובין כך אין היתר לפגום בכבוד אדם משום זה
כמבואר לקמן, ואכמ"ל).
ב) לענין פגם בכבודו ובכבוד אבותיו ע' בשו"ת המהרש"ל סי"א
בנידון הדומה הרבה לשלנו ר"ל שכ' המהרש"ל שגביית עדות לפסול
איש מחזקת כשרותו ופוגם בכבודו וכבוד אבותיו .. פשיטא ופשיטא
שאף בדיעבד אינו כשר והעדים והבית דין עברו משום לא תשא שמע
שוא וכו
ע' מש"כ בשו"ת המהרש"ל סי"א במעשה שהי' שם הדומה קצת לנידון
דידן שבי"ד גבו עדות שלא בפני בעל דין "להורידו מחזקת כשרות
בעידי כיעור", וז"ל:
אבל גביית עדות לפסול איש מחזקת כשרותו לפגום בכבודו וכבוד
אבותיו ... פשיטא ופשיטא שאף בדיעבד אינו כשר והעדים והבית
דין עברו משום לא תשא שמע שוא וקרינן בי' לא תשיא וראוים
להשליך לכלבים כדאיתא במסכת שבועות והסמ"ג הביאו (הגמ'
בשבועות לא מנין לדיין שלא ישמע דברי בעל דין (חבירו) קודם
שיבא בעל דין חבירו ת''ל מדבר שקר תרחק מנין לבעל דין שלא
יטעים דבריו לדיין קודם שיבא בעל דין חבירו ת''ל מדבר שקר
תרחק רב כהנא מתני {שמות
כ-ז} מלא תשא לא תשיא): וראה נא ראה עד כמה חשו עמודי
עולם על כגון דא
ג) לגבי דין מרומה ומקום שיש לחוש לערמה, הנה אפי' לענין
להתיר עגונה מבואר באהע"ז סי"ז סכ"א ברמ"א בשם רי"ו שצריך
דרישה וחקירה , ולענין דיני ממונות מבואר בחו"מ ס"ל ס"א וגם
בס'' ט"ו ס"ג, ולאסור אשה על בעלה מבואר באהע"ז סי"א ס"ד.
ולגבי גדר דרישה וחקירה, עמש"כ ברמ"א סט"ו ס"ג בשם ריב"ש
דאף דדין מרומה צריך דו"ח כדיני נפשות אינו ממש כדיני נפשות,
שאם אמר אחד "איני יודע" מכ"מ אין הדין בטל , אבל בפתחי
תשובה אהע"ז סק"צ הביא מהר"ב אשכנזי בשם כמה וכמה ראשונים,
דהיינו רמב"ם, רמ"ה, ר"י, ור"ן שדין מרומה הוא ממש כדיני
נפשות ואם אמר אחד איני יודע הדין בטל, ומצטט שם לדברי הש"ך
בחו"מ ס' ל"ג סקט"ז שמסביר שהיות שכל הטעם שלא בעי דו"ח הוא
מטעם כדי שלא תנעול דלת, ממילא במקום שיש חשש דין מרומה
אוקמוה שוב אדאורייתא, וצריך עדות שיכול להזימו וממילא אם
אמר איני יודע כל הדין בטל.
ובכלל יש לע' שאפי' בדיני ממונות הרי הטעם שביטלו חז"ל דין
דרישה וחקירה רק כדי שלא תנעול דלת לפני לוים, וכ"כ הסמ"ע
בס"ל סק"א זה דוקא בדיני ממונות השכיחים אבל לדון בחבלות דלא
שכיחי ולית בהו חסרון כיס אפשר שצריך דו"ח, ובנידון דידן
הוצאת הלעז דומה לחבלות שאין בהן חסרון כיס ואף שאיסורם גדול
מאוד שמבואר חומרם בחו"מ ס"א ס"ו, סכ"ז ס"ב, ס' רכ"ח ס"א, ס'
ת"כ סל"ח וסל"ט. ואם אמרו שצריך בהם דו"ח לדון בהוצאת שם רע
כדי להוצאי ממון וודאי פשוט שכש"כ שמוטל על בי"ד גופא שכדי
שיהיו מותרים הם גופא לבייש יהי' מקודם דו"ח. וחוץ מזה עמש"כ
בח"ח הל' רכילות רפ"ט בבמ"ח שכמו שגרמא בניזקין אסור אע"ג
דפטור מתשלומין, כן הוא בהוצאת שם רע, הרי היו צריכין ליזהר
בזה הרבה.
ד) לאסור אשה לבעלה:, ע' בב"ש אהע"ז סי"א סקט"ז בשם מהרשל
סי"א דלאסור אשת איש לכו"ע לא מהני עדות שלא בפני בעל דין אף
בדיעבד, ובפ"ת שם כמה דעות דכדי להפריש מאיסור אפשר דמותר
שלא בפני בע"ד משום דזכות הוא להפריש ישראל מאיסור, ונמצא
לפי"ז בנד"ד שעשו גם בזה היפוך הדין, כי לאסור על בעלה
הראשון לא נמצא היתר לקבל שלא בפניו כשאינו אלם וכו', משא"כ
כדי לאסור על בעלה השני מותר לת' הרמ"א בשם מהר"ר הירץ
מבריסק ולדעת המאירי.
By now it is quite clear that there was no real basis for the Heter but what will persuade those who still maintain their position is not SVORES but consequences like loss of financial support etc. Without the above it is highly doubtful that anything can be achieved.
ReplyDelete“I
ReplyDeletebelieve that there are several solid reasons why in our case there is
absolutely no צד
whatsoever to allow a Posek to rely on what he was told.”
Excellent post.
My theory is that a crooked lawyer is behind all this, Tamar Epstein’s
lawyer Fedrick Goldfein.
Internet:
“Goldfein, who is also a rabbi, said he was led to
believe the $60,000 would be given to Friedman in exchange for the get, and
said he was surprised when he learned Friedman had been beaten. "The
$60,000 was not for anything like that. It was to give to Aharon Friedman,”
Goldfein, who was testifying under immunity, claimed.”
This looks like perjury to me. Here is a
lawyer who aids and abets criminal activity. He testified in court that
he spoke with Wolmark and Mendel Epstein and wired $60,000
“Prosecutors introduced bank records showing four
payments totaling $60,000 to Epstein's congregations – Congregation Kol Reuven
and Congregation Beth Jacob – in March and April of 2012. Goldfein testified
that Friedman did not receive the $60,000.”
My case with Susan is closed. I lost my house and 55% of my pension. TIAA pays Susan now $870 monthly (55% of my
pension) reported to my social security number.
TIAA has been paying Susan 55% of my pension for child support since
February 1994.
Gerald, aren't your children with her long past age 18? Why is their any child support?
ReplyDeleteStill no answer how RNG would decide an issue he knew (or should have known; if this is his answer, he is even more negligent) is a very publicly contentious matter, that is public knowledge (thanks to his client), ba$ed on information given him from a bia$ed source, that was $hopped around (unsuccessfully) and opposed by the local rabbonim, that he knew (or should have known; if he claims he didn't know, heis even more negligent) would receive massive public condemnation.
ReplyDeleteIt just doesn'tmake $en$e.
Terrible, Gerald. I believe that I have a pretty good idea how you feel. May G-d preserve your sanity and if it wasn't Divinely destined, make up for your devastating loss......and to move on to better things soon!
ReplyDeleteMr. Ploni,
ReplyDeleteI responded to your original comment before it was reposted here. If you don't mind taking a look there. Basic summary - is there still an issue when the בע"ד is a shoita? Is קבלת עדות בפני בע"ד possible in such a scenario? The p'sac here is dependent on the fact that he is a shoita and if so AF would not have to be present. Secondly RMF did not seem concerned with either קבלת עדות שלא בפני בע"ד or פוגם בכבודו ובכבוד אבותיו. (Nowhere in any of the tshuvos is it implied that RMF met with any of the husbands or that he had the rabbonim involved create a ב"ד to be mafkiah the kiddushin בפני בע"ד).
I agree. Should encourage people not to donate to Aguda or philly yeshiva while Kamenetsky has official position there.
ReplyDeleteבאות ב) במקורות צטטתי את דברי המהרש"ל בשו"ת סי"א שכ' בחומר דין קבלת עדות שלא בפני בעל דין במקום שפוגם בכבודו ובכבוד אבותיו, וכ' המהרש"ל "וראוים להשליך לכלבים", שהוא באמת לשון המבהיל מאוד, ולא הסברתי יפה את כוונתו במש"כ "וראוים להשליך לכלכים". והמעיין יראה כוונתו שבמס' שבועות לא. איתא שדיין השומע דברי בעל דין שלא בפני בעל דין עובר על "לא תשא" קרי בי' לא תשיא, ובפסחים קיח. דריש הגמ' מפסוק זה גופא דלא תשא שהמספר ומקבל לשון הרע ראוי להשליכו לכלבים מדסמיך קרא "לכלב תשליכון אותו" לפסוק "לא תשא שמע שוא" וקרי בי' לא תשיא.
ReplyDeleteדברי המהרש"ל והגמ' בשבועות ובפסחים כלשונם:
זלה"ק של המהרש"ל: "העדים והבית
דין עברו משום לא תשא שמע שוא וקרינן בי' לא תשיא וראוים
להשליך לכלבים כדאיתא במסכת שבועות והסמ"ג הביאו"
ובגמ'
בשבועות לא. "מנין לדיין שלא ישמע דברי בעל דין (חבירו) קודם
שיבא בעל דין חבירו ת''ל מדבר שקר תרחק מנין לבעל דין שלא
יטעים דבריו לדיין קודם שיבא בעל דין חבירו ת''ל מדבר שקר
תרחק רב כהנא מתני {שמות
כ-ז} מלא תשא לא תשיא"
ובפסחים קיח: ואמר רב ששת משום ר''א בן עזריה כל המספר לשון הרע וכל המקבל לשון הרע וכל המעיד
עדות שקר בחבירו ראוי להשליכו לכלבים שנאמר {שמות כב-ל} לכלב
תשליכון אותו וכתיב בתריה {שמות
כג-א} לא תשא שמע שוא וקרי ביה לא תשיא
"what will persuade those who still maintain their position is not SVORES but consequences like loss of financial support"
ReplyDeleteActually, I think the opposite is true.
The reason why they "still maintain their position" is PRECISELY because of " financial support".
You see, many if not most of the major תומכים of out of town Yeshivos and mosdos are on the MO camp (or less). I wouldn't be surprised that the reason the Aguda remains silent is for the same reason - a national org. need to worry about the fallout of coming out in a position that seems biased and insensitive to women.
They're in a dilemma that withholding our $36 donations won't resolve. Of course, במקום שיש חילול ה' .. this should pale in comparison to the problem of אשת איש, etc. ... maybe Tamar has been told not to do certain things, in confidence .. I don't know.
The solution RSK and company is looking for so that the problem goes away is for AF to give a get and thereby make the issue vanish.
This is imho very unfair to AF and very shortsighted to the bigger problem effecting not just the small number of men who were or will be victimized by false and damaging (iatrogenic) psychology .. it also effects the much bigger issue of what does the Torah really say about secular psychology, emotional distress and interpersonal relationships.
In NY (only such state) its now 21.
ReplyDeleteBut your question stands.
Susan with her crafty lawyers (Irwin Haut, a”h, and
ReplyDeleteothers) got exaggerated claims for child support and then a 9% compounded on a
false basis. I don’t understand what
happened in my case. I’m completely in the
dark. This Tamar Epstein remarriage with
no get to a husband alive and well and free---impossible!! I hope the
authorities force Goldfein to reveal more on his crafty activities. I bet the whole idea was his.
Oh, I immediately moved
on when I divorced Susan 2/17/1993. I write in response to her lies in court
papers. I turned 70 on Hanuka and I’m not
working. I still have more exams for the
Rabbanut. I’m busy busy. I very much
enjoy my wife Yemima and our 3 daughters. B”h.
Gerald, but why are you paying "child support" long past their 18th birthday?
ReplyDelete" I don’t understand what happened in my case. I’m completely in the dark."
ReplyDeleteTo me this sentence says it all. no wonder you're so upset with Tamar' story - you know what it's like to have people "milk" you and denigrate you ... without having the ability to face your tormentors and force them to prove their claims.
May Hashem give you much כוח!!!
You enjoy your family? Great! Then send Susan straight to hell! By the way, I referred DanielNY to see your post, excellent to illustrate why halacha should not be *Reformed* to state law, that mandates alimony, equitable distribution, etc.....
ReplyDeleteI tried responding there (although it might be a bit muddled, as I'm rushed)
ReplyDeleteYou are correct and all the Rosh hayeshiva are behind this heter and other supposed heterim. They don't care about Halacha at all and give heterim to everyone that has donated a few dollars to philly. Yudi is a part of the Kamenetzky gang and no innocent fellow. They are all in cahoots. Lesson to be learned is to stay away from philly Yeshiva and anyone that is connected in anyway. I would definitely suggest to stay away from Philly boys when it comes to shidduchim.
ReplyDeleteMendel Epstein (internet):
ReplyDelete“He laughed about how he would keep police off his
trail in Brooklyn, where he also lived.
"They couldn't try me in Brooklyn," he's
heard telling the agents. "The whole jury would be women. They'd say 'Hang
him (the husband). Kill him!'"”
What’s going on in Brooklyn?? There’re 2 sides to
every story. The women in Brooklyn like to wash their dirty laundry in public,
meaning using social network and media and dirty court tricks to pressure for a
divorce.
Yevamoth116a:
“What is to be understood by DISCORD BETWEEN HIM AND
HER? Rab Judah replied in the name of Samuel: When [a wife] says to her
husband: Divorce me! Do not all women (Lit. all of them also) say this? (When
they are angry. They do not mean it seriously. Why, then, should a woman,
because of a momentary outburst, be suspected of inventing a tale about her
husband's death?)
Pacer Gerald Aranoff:
1 Aranoff,
Gerald (pla) nyedce 1:2001-cv-02469 190 04/23/2001 08/28/2001
Aranoff v. Aranoff
2 Aranoff,
Gerald (pla) nysdce 1:2001-cv-02543 440 03/26/2001 03/26/2001
Aranoff v. Teachers Insurance
3 Aranoff,
Gerald (pla) nysdce 1:2009-cv-02076 791 03/06/2009 03/06/2009
Aranoff
v. Teachers Insurance and Annuity Association
https://iapps.courts.state.ny.us/webcivil/etrackLogin
WebCivil Supreme - 4 Cases Found.
1 Bronx 008538/1990
Disposed ARANOFF,GERALD BURTON
& GREENBERG FORDHAM
UNIVERSITY 06/15/1990 ALAN SAKS
M
2 Kings 023213/1991
Disposed ARANOFF,SUSAN IRWIN H.
HAUT, ESQ. ARANOFF,GERALD Gerald Aranoff 05/14/2007 MICHAEL A. AMBROSIO, 5B
M
3 Kings 046412/1992
Disposed ARANOFF,SUSAN POPKIN,ELIZABETH
JACKSON ARANOFF,GERARD IAN ANDERSON 06/21/1995 WILLIAM
RIGLER M
4 Kings 054688/2012
Disposed ARANOFF,SUSAN TITONE
& SERLIN, LLP ARANOFF,GERALD 06/30/2015 ERIC I. PRUS, 5A M
Fordham University kicked me out of their PhD program
in economics January 1984. Thank G—d,
because my research work improved immensely.
CUNY gave me the PhD June 1991 and I made Aliyah July 1991. Case #
1---failed so what?
Susan kicked me out July 1991. Thank G—d because G—d sent me a new wife and
much blessings. Cases 2, 3, and 4 failed---so what?
The radical feminists are so bad down in the USA.
Ploni says: “" I don’t understand what happened in my
ReplyDeletecase. I’m completely in the dark." To me this sentence says it all. no
wonder you're so upset with Tamar' story - you know what it's like to have
people "milk" you and denigrate you ... without having the ability to
face your tormentors and force them to prove their claims.”
No, I don’t know what it’s like to have people
denigrate me. I lost in NYS and in
federal courts. Only Susan denigrated
and tormented me with her lies.
Rabbi Kornfeld wrote this handwritten letter on stationary
of Congregation Agudath Shalom of Flatbush Eighteenth Avenue Jewish Center.
July 1, 1991
My very dear Miss Aranoff,
I am writing to you both as a Rabbi, husband and father,
that yoyur husband Jerry is not abandoning his family, but on the contyrary his
love for you is so great that you have always been and still are part of his
dream of settling in Israel and providing a home for you and the children. His love for you and the children are deeply
embedded in his heart. He has acquired a prominent position in the College of
Technology in Jerusalem as a professor and going on to greater heights and also
a most wonderful apartment to accommodate the entire family. Whatever he is going to do in Israel it is
only for your welfare and that of the children.
Please do not forsake him. He is
looking forward to spending a beautiful life together with you and the children
for as I understand it was your dream to go to Israel. He loves you with all his heart and
soul. O remain always yours to serve.
Most Sincerely, Rabbi Solomon Kornfeld.
Susan writes 11/4/2015 to the NYS Court of Appeals:
“Appellant abandoned me and our six children, ages 6,11,14,16,18,
and 20, in 1991 and failed to pay child support. He has been tormenting me eversince with
hundreds of pages of repetitive and frivolous motions and attempted many times
to overturn the court’s enforcement of his child support obligations. Appellant has defied court orders to stop
filing endless motiuons, forcing me to represent myself pro se, with brief
exceptions,because of the astronomical legal fees his motions would cost to
respond each time. He has stolen time
that I might have spent as a single, working parent with my children or on
desperately needed respite to rest and care for my health. I could hardly keep above water because of
his endless motions, sometimes 2 or 3 per week.”