Tuesday, March 12, 2024

Fighting frumkeit with frumkeit

 Yesterday I traveled to Beit Shemesh for Sheva Berachos with the Chasidic portion of the family

One of my nephews told me the following -

There was a very very pious Jew who was so frum that when he was on  his first trip in an airplane the stewardess asked him if he wanted a drink - He was so upset hearing a female voice he threw up. 


Later in life he had a job which required walking a short distance from the frum bus - through a block of Manhattan. He couldn't deal with the sights so he decided to ask his Rav for permission to stop work to preserve his holiness.

 His Rav thought about the issue and said he could not give him permission. 

The holy man asked for an explanation for refusing his request which was obviously needed

The Rav answered simple "It states clearly in Chovas Halevavos - that the foundation of all Prishus (asceticism) is to have an adequate job so that you are not a burden on others         - Obviously I can not tell you to stop working."

Chovas HaLevavos (09:05)And likewise, you need to use your body for what will provide your livelihood, so that you will be saved from borrowing and stealing, and from needing the kindness of people to support you and to benefit you, thereby giving away to them your merits, and giving your piety to he who was pious towards you. Likewise, so that you won't be a burden on people, as one of the Sages said: "G-d will have great mercy on His servants who separate from this world, but only if his separation has not become a burden on his friends, because he engaged in a trade thereby freeing them from troubling themselves for him", as written: "For you shall eat the labor of your hands: happy shall you be, and it shall be well with you" (Tehilim 128:2). It has already been said: "the beginning of abstinence is the securing of a livelihood". And it was further stated: "the beginning of abstinence is to think properly on arranging the obtaining of one's needs", which means to work to secure one's needs.

6 comments :

  1. Almost anywhere else this guy would be taken to a psychiatrist and put on appropriate meds and psychotherapy.
    In the frum community, he gets called pious and accommodated in his dysfunction as much as possible.
    Moshe Rabeinu managed to talk to women without vomiting but this guy couldn't?

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    1. Moses got divorced so he could always be able to speak to G-d

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    2. not clear what happened or why, and who the cushite woman was

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    3. It is not clear what happened? Chazal are clear

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    4. In aggadah, maybe not literal

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    5. So are we expected to believe that Moshe agreed to give his son to Idolatry?

      "The midrash explains how Moses and Zipporah could have had a son who had not been circumcised. When Moses asked Jethro to marry his daughter Zipporah, Jethro had told him: “If you accept the thing that I will tell you, then I will give her in marriage to you.” Moses asked: “What is this thing?” To which Jethro replied: “The first son born to you shall be for idolatry, and your following sons will be for Heaven.” Moses accepted Jethro’s condition (Mehilta de-Rabbi Ishmael Masekhta de-Amalek, Yitro 1). This exegesis explains why only one of Moses’s sons was uncircumcised, and why they were not in such mortal danger immediately after his birth, but only after they had left Jethro’s home and were released from his vow."

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