Thursday, November 14, 2024

Marriage Skills Handbook - Guest Post by Raffi Bilek, LCSW-C

 The low divorce rate of the frum community used to be a badge of pride.

 By this point, we all know more than a few divorced people in our own communities – sometimes folks who have been divorced multiple times, or within months of being married. It is painful to see.

 What happened?

 No doubt the problem is complex, and there are many explanations that could be given. I’m not a sociologist; I’m a marriage counselor. So I’m not going to try to tackle the reasons for this shift in our society or what can be done on a communal level to address it. I’m just going to offer you something to protect your own marriage.

 It’s communication.

 No chiddushim there; we’ve all heard that buzzword before. I’m just coming to provide some practical, actionable steps to actually doing it.

 Enter The Couples Communication Handbook: The Skills You Never Learned for the Marriage You Always Wanted. I wrote this book based on my decade-plus of experience working with couples to help improve, repair, and save marriages. I think it’s got a lot to offer folks regardless of how they’re feeling about their marriage right now (unless you feel like the communication in your marriage is as good as it could possibly ever be – if that’s you, let me know).

In truth, there aren’t many chiddushim in here either. It’s a lot of ideas that have existed already, put together in a way that is digestible and easy to read, with maybe a few twists of my own.

 I should note that this is not a Torah book; it’s for general audiences, but it is perfectly clean and acceptable for the frum community. (There is a very brief section discussing talking about sex, which does not get any more graphic than this sentence you just read.)

 If you feel like you could use a boost in your communication and connection with your spouse, I think you’ll get a lot out of this book.

 על ידי שלום שבין איש לאשתו יהיה עזר לאדם ליחד הדודים למעלה

-- Ben Yehoyada, Berachos 28b

Trump Sends Shockwaves Through Washington With Gaetz Pick

 https://www.wsj.com/politics/policy/trump-sends-shockwaves-through-washington-with-gaetz-pick-c1a7f468?mod=hp_lead_pos1

Most of Trump’s picks indicates he wants a firm grip on his nominees and that he values loyalty, a quality prized by all presidents but one that he has put a particular premium on. Gaetz’s selection also has the benefit of exciting the president-elect’s MAGA base.

Trump’s AG pick called ADL ‘racist,’ invited Holocaust denier to State of the Union

 https://www.timesofisrael.com/trumps-ag-pick-called-adl-racist-invited-holocaust-denier-to-state-of-the-union/

This past spring, Gaetz, alongside Representative Marjorie Taylor Greene, opposed a bill that would codify an official definition of antisemitism because it classified the view that Jews killed Jesus — which Gaetz endorsed — as antisemitic.

“The Gospel itself would meet the definition of antisemitism under the terms of this bill!” Gaetz wrote on X, adding, “The Bible is clear. There is no myth or controversy on this.”

Wednesday, November 13, 2024

Affirmative Action and Trump

 For years Conservatives have complained about Affirmative Action because it is not concerned with job related factors but only race or yichus for jobs or college admission. 

Trump declared at his first presidency he was going to hire only the best people. But many of them ended up disagreeing with him and became his biggest critics

This time around he is not looking for competence or experience - the most important and non- negotiable factor is loyalty - not only now but forever. As his son declared  "I want people who ‘don’t think they know better’ than father in Cabinet."

It is ironic that he is using affirmative action but substituting loyalty for race because he doesn't want resistance to doing anything he wants! After all he doesn't want anybody who thinks he knows better than he does ,since he is such a stable genius who aced competency tests. Nobody could possibly know more than he does!

Trump Jr.: I want people who ‘don’t think they know better’ than father in Cabinet

 https://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/4979130-trump-jr-involved-transition/

Donald Trump Jr. said he wants people who “don’t think they know better” than his father, President-elect Trump, to be a part of the Republican administration. 

“I’m going to be heavily involved on the transition. I want to make sure now that we know who the real players are, the people who will actually deliver on the president’s message, the people who don’t think that they know better than the duly elected president of the United States,” Donald Trump Jr. said during his Thursday morning appearance on “Fox & Friends.” 

“I want to make sure that those people are in his Cabinet. I want to make sure that those people are in this administration,” he added. 

Trump taps Fox News host Pete Hegseth for Defense secretary

 https://thehill.com/policy/defense/4987358-pete-hegseth-defense-secretary/

Defense secretary proved to be one of Trump’s more volatile Cabinet posts during his first term in office. Jim Mattis resigned after Trump said he was withdrawing troops from Syria, and his replacement, Mark Esper, was fired days after the 2020 election and has since been critical of Trump.

Ex-Fox Host Flames Former Colleague Pete Hegseth After Trump’s Pentagon Nod

 https://www.thedailybeast.com/ex-fox-host-gretchen-carlson-flames-former-colleague-pete-hegseth-after-trump-pentagon-nod/

Former Fox News host Gretchen Carlson said she was “stunned” Tuesday by Donald Trump’s intention to nominate Fox & Friends host Pete Hegseth as his Secretary of Defense.

“From silly diner interviews on Weekend Fox and Friends to Secretary of Defense?“ Carlson wrote on X. ”I never thought I’d say I’m stunned about any pick after the election but nominating Pete Hegseth for this incredibly important role? Yes he’s a veteran … and?"

Tuesday, November 12, 2024

A Surprising Source of Dementia Relief: Cannabis

 https://www.wsj.com/health/wellness/dementia-symptoms-treatment-marijuana-562b1c9e?mod=wsjhp_columnists_pos_2

Doctors who prescribe cannabis to dementia patients say it can alleviate anxiety, agitation and pain, and improve sleep, appetite and mood. While there isn’t much definitive research on the use of cannabis for dementia, several small studies have backed its usefulness in soothing agitation.

Donald Trump's Cabinet Picks Might Cost GOP House Majority

 https://www.newsweek.com/donald-trump-cabinet-picks-might-cost-gop-house-majority-1984525

President-elect Donald Trump has named two members of the House of Representatives to his cabinet, and at least four more Representatives are rumored to be joining them in high office.

Having not yet officially won a majority in the House, the President-elect could further tighten the Republican's margin, which is likely be a very narrow majority over the Democrats, when all votes have been counted.

According to The Associated Press, the Republicans have so far won 214 of 435 seats in the House of Representatives; they need 218 to form a majority. Democrats have won 205.

Democratic warnings about Trump were not simply campaign rhetoric

 https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2024/11/12/democratic-warnings-about-trump-were-not-simply-campaign-rhetoric/

The issue isn’t that Democrats never believed Trump posed such a risk. The issue is that the party and its presidential candidate lost an election centered on that risk. The process of democracy, responding in large part to global economic patterns, awarded the presidency to a candidate who is overtly and increasingly antagonistic to the American system. A candidate representing a party in which a majority told pollsters four years ago that the governmental separation of powers was not extremely important.

The argument that Democrats were insincere in their concerns about democracy is, particularly when offered by Trump supporters, an effort to diminish the idea that any such risk exists.

It obviously does.

Latino men just didn’t want a woman president

 https://thehill.com/opinion/columnists/juan-williams/4980787-latino-men-just-didnt-want-a-woman-president/?tbref=hp

No, it wasn’t “the Economy, stupid.” Speaking as a Black man born into a Spanish-speaking family, let me tell you what last week’s election was really about.

It was about millions of men — many with my Latino immigrant background, some with my skin color — who don’t want any woman, especially a woman of color, in the White House.

Netanyahu:'Annexation when Trump returns'

 https://www.israelnationalnews.com/news/399023

The Prime Minister said recently in closed talks that after Trump's entry into the White House, the issue of sovereignty over the Judea and Samaria areas should be revisited.

Ex-Trump aides warn Israeli ministers not to assume he’ll back annexation in 2nd term

 https://www.timesofisrael.com/ex-trump-aides-warn-israeli-ministers-not-to-assume-hell-back-annexation-in-2nd-term/

Cabinet members told support for controversial move could hamper other US foreign policy goals, would only happen as part of peace plan like the one in 2020 that far-right opposed

Monday, November 11, 2024

Democrats and the case of mistaken identity politics - The 2024 election post mortem is a wake for woke

 https://www.wral.com/story/maureen-dowd-democrats-and-the-case-of-mistaken-identity-politics/21716527/

Donald Trump won a majority of white women and remarkable numbers of Black and Latino voters and young men.

Democratic insiders thought people would vote for Kamala Harris, even if they didn’t like her, to get rid of Trump. But more people ended up voting for Trump, even though many didn’t like him, because they liked the Democratic Party less.