Sunday, February 13, 2011

Abuse: Psychotherapist seduction of clients - Yes frum therapists do it also!


It is necessary to be aware of one of the clear and established dangers of psychotherapy. That is the therapeutic relationship makes it relatively easy for a therapist to seduce his/her client. Therapist and client  spend much secluded time together discussing very personal matters and often this involves intense emotion.

Even frum therapists - including rabbis - have seduced their clients. While it is clearly against the law - but this applies primarily to licensed therapists. Seduction by unlicensed therapists apparently is viewed as two consenting adults . While for licensed therapists it is acknowledged that the therapist has a position of authority and  thus sexual relationship with a client is viewed as an abuse of that authority. There is also a halachic problem. A married woman who has sexual relationship with a therapist is committing adultery and her husband needs to divorce her. When a frum married woman is seduced by her therapist - if she files a complaint her husband will most likely believe her and thus must divorce her.  The case if the husband doesn't know or doesn't believe his wife must be handled by a major posek. Because of this halachic problem - as well as the disgrace to the family - seduction often goes unreported in the frum community.

A woman (or man) who has been seduced by their therapist or rabbi needs to speak to a competent Rav who has the ability to organize community resources - including the police - to stop the therapist
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This page of Dr. Ken Pope provides some information. Aside from the terrible sin - there is the likelihood of serious psychological damage.
  1. When people are hurting, unhappy, frightened, or confused, they may seek help from a therapist. They may be depressed, perhaps thinking of killing themselves. They may be unhappy in their work or relationships, and not know how to bring about change. They may be suffering trauma from rape, incest, or domestic violence. They may be bingeing and purging, abusing drugs and alcohol, or engaging in other behaviors that can destroy health and sometimes be fatal.
  2. The therapeutic relationship is a special one, characterized by exceptional vulnerability and trust. People may talk to their therapists about thoughts, feelings, events, and behaviors that they would never disclose to anyone else. Every state in the United States has recognized the special nature of the therapeutic relationship and the special responsibilities that therapists have in relation to their clients by requiring special training and licensure for therapists, and by recognizing a therapist-patient privilege which safeguards the privacy of what patients talk about to their therapist.
  3. A relatively small minority of therapists take advantage of the client's trust and vulnerability and of the power inherent in the therapist's role by sexually exploiting the client. Each state has prohibited this abuse of trust, vulnerability, and power through licensing regulations. Therapist-patient sex is also subject to civil law as a tort (i.e., offenders may be sued for malpractice), and some states have criminalized the offense. The ethics codes of all major mental health professionals prohibit the offense.

12 comments :

  1. There is also a halachic problem. A married woman who has sexual relationship with a therapist is committing adultery and her husband needs to divorce her. When a frum married woman is seduced by her therapist - if she files a complaint her husband will most likely believe her and thus must divorce her. The case if the husband doesn't know or doesn't believe his wife must be handled by a major posek. Because of this halachic problem - as well as the disgrace to the family - seduction often goes unreported in the frum community.

    Even if the husband doesn't believe her, SHE knows it happened. So how can she continue to be married to her husband after the adultery?

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  3. "Seduction by unlicensed therapists apparently is viewed as two consenting adults."

    Isn't it prohibited by law to practice therapy unlicensed?

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  4. Sigmund Freud, the founder of Psychoanalysis, wrote about the phenomenon, and sharply criticised it almost 100 years ago. He had 2 arguments: a) it is immoral, and b) it interferes with the actual therapy, since the Analyst has to be objective.
    Incidentally, he was married to the grand daughter of R' Isaac Bernays - the teacher of R' S.R. Hirsch!

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  5. "So how can she continue to be married to her husband after the adultery?"

    She can't divorce him, what's your question exactly

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  6. The article linked below, although primarily about boundary violations in rabbinic situations, also defines boundary violations in general, and discusses them in clinical situations as well:

    "Rabbi, Make a Fence for Yourself"
    by Rael Strous

    (scroll down to link on page)

    http://www.yctorah.org/content/view/662/10/

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  7. in the us, (nys, at least) anyone can open an office and do therapy. if you want, you can apply for a license to be more "professional."

    2. for some reason, he has to divorce her, but she doesnt have to divorce him. but there is an "issur caret" of "eishet ish" on her (and the offending paramour), nevertheless, on the original (multiple) acts.

    if the husband is a cohen, its much stricter.

    nevertheless, most rabbonim will "convince" the husband nothing happened, so as to preserve the marriage. the "issur" is only if the husband (cohen or not) believes it really happened.

    4. bigger problem -- "msadrei kiddushin" later marrying an offending couple (after get, etc). totally impermissible. happens all the time -- no justification, except $. (i assume they charge extra for such chuppa ve'kiddushin. a reg chuppa isnt that expensive.)

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  8. nevertheless, most rabbonim will "convince" the husband nothing happened, so as to preserve the marriage. the "issur" is only if the husband (cohen or not) believes it really happened.

    What is the benefit of maintaining a marriage with an adulterous woman?

    4. bigger problem -- "msadrei kiddushin" later marrying an offending couple (after get, etc). totally impermissible. happens all the time -- no justification, except $. (i assume they charge extra for such chuppa ve'kiddushin. a reg chuppa isnt that expensive.)

    The so-called "msadrei kiddushin" will knowingly marry an adulterous woman with the man she committed adultery with?? Shocking to say the least.

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  9. I've heard of one Israeli rabbi/therapist who get the wife to perform orally, thus getting around the issue of needing to get divorced.

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  10. Anyone in a one person office is subject to the halachos of yichud, without the options to be makil. There are various steps to take to insure that there will be all the confidentiality and privacy needed for therapy or counseling without the risk of violating boundaries of halacha.

    Incidentally, I monitor things like this. There certainly is a problem of professional therapists who cross these ethical, moral, and halachic boundaries. Fortunately, these cases are few. Professionals have procedures to enforce ethical issues such as this. The place where I have found much more trouble is the "paraprofessional", such as the rabbis and related religious individuals who engage in counseling those of opposite gender 1:1. There is no one who would believe that Rabbi Ploni crossed such boundaries. Also, the client is generally needy and dependent, and can more easily succumb to temptation, attention, and affection even when it is a flagrant issur. I wish there was a way to pay closer attention to that.

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  11. sam -- there are caees where a spouse agrees to remnain. (promises of fudelity, whatever).

    spitzer, bill clinton (hillary too), edwards -- in the us.

    halachically, if the husband doesnt really believe it, i guess its ok, if he wishes to remain in the marriage. its his decision (if its made with proper external advice / counseling.)

    though halachically, and secular legally, there may be issues of entitlement to a get / secular divorce subsequently, if the spouse "waives" the adultery by subsequent relations, with knowledge.

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  12. DT wrote: "Abuse: Psychotherapist seduction of clients - Yes frum therapists do it also!"

    DT: What evidence do you have, if any, that " frum therapists do it also!"

    Or was that mere supposition on your part?

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