Daniel,
It saddens me that you would write such a strong letter of condemnation to my statements posted on your blog. I wanted to make sure that you are aware that I have been living within the eruv of various orthodox communities for just under 10 years. Though I am no longer looking to become observant, I am very familiar with many of the cultural issues pertaining to sex crimes. When I've had questions I have always sought out one of my halachic advisors.
I'm sorry that your experience with the secular world has been to be looked down at. I have never thought of the Torah observant community as being "Primitive" or "unenlightened." I have used the terms "insulated " and "unaware," yet never "primitive" or unenlightened." I have often asked myself, how can someone have information or reach a level of awareness if they have not been education on various issues?
It was until around 1999 - 2001, that sexual abuse began to be discussed in orthodox circles. It wasn't until the case of rabbi Baruch Lanner www.theawarenesscenter.org
2001 was the yearThe Awareness Center was founded I was living in Jerusalem at the time, and realized how little was known in how to deal with cases appropriately in the religious world. When I saw appropriate I am meaning reporting crimes to law enforcement, verses chasing the offender out of town -- or shaming and blaming the victim (or their family members) into silence.
I became aware of the severity of the problem when I started doing outreach with a friend with religious teens who made their way down to Ben Yehuda. Just about every teen I met disclosed stories to me of molestation. Some of the kids were incest survivors others were being abused by neighbors, teachers, rabbis, etc. When I tried to get them help -- there was really nothing out there set up to address the issues. Most of the teens I spoke with came from communities such as Neve Yaakov and Har Nof.
Most of those who work in the field of sexual violence have at least a masters degree. This means 4 years of college, plus two years of graduate school. After they receive their masters degrees they are required to received at least 1000 hours of supervision prior to becoming licensed. Law enforcement officials who work sex crimes also have to undergo vigorous training in this highly specialized field.
Though our rabbis are experts in halacha, they are not experts in criminal matters, especially sex crimes committed against our children. When The Awareness Center first got started, I could not find one rabbi who could explain the difference between sexual assault and sexual harassment. Whenever the topic came up of child molestation in which the perpetrator and the victim were male, they automatically called the sex crime -- "homosexual behavior." Unfortunately, in most insulated communities using the wrong terms to describe a sex crime still occurs. By using incorrect termonology often shames and blames the victim and little is done to stop the assailant, which ends up with the offender creating move victims.
Those who are gay do not commit sex crimes anymore then those are heterosexual. When a male sex offender molests a child who is male -- this is NOT "homosexual behavior". The same is true in cases in which a yeshiva bochur is manipulated or forced into having sexual relations with a rav, or anyone else. These are SEX CRIMES!
I'm sorry you are confusing facts and the attempt to prevent anyone else from being a victim of a sex crimes as being condescending, offensive or insensitive towards your religious values. The bottom line is that our ravs don't have the information, education or training to be making determinations if a sex crime had occurred. Just as I would not go to a rav to determine if I needed open heart surgery, I would not go to a rav to determine if a sex crime had occurred.
My suggestion is that our rabbis send a few students to graduate school, let them volunteer at rape crisis centers, let them study law enforcement and then maybe I and many others would feel differently about them making a determination if a child or adult was molested or raped.
Vicki Polin, MA, NCC, LCPC, ATR-BC
Founder, Executive Director -The Awareness Center, Inc.
(the international Jewish Coalition Against Sexual Abuse/Assault)
P.O. Box 65273, Baltimore, MD 21209
www.theawarenesscenter.org
443-857-5560