Misconceptions about marriage - a wife is not a shtender

 Steipler The Steipler told fathers to look for 3 qualities in a son in law1 intelligence, diligence (hasmoda) and character (midos)One father objected saying there was no need for the third since all talmidei chachomim have midos.The Steipler responded “A wife is not a shtender!” after many years in yeshiva a bachor learns to relate properly to his shtender and gemora but not to a request to take out the garbage or who needs attention d character to put up with a sick wife a sick child to sleep. For that you need good character