Tuesday, November 21, 2017

dr shulem Psychology

https://player.fm/series/series-1283166/baruch-shulem

sexual buse

times of israel




This week, the International Day for the Elimination of Violence against Women will be marked in Israel — as in other parts of the globe — in the midst of a massive outpouring of testimonies of widespread sexual harassment. The local version of the #MeToo phenomenon (#GamAni) that is sweeping the country has enabled many to expose incidents of abuse — and even outright violence — which they have kept pent up for years. They, like their counterparts elsewhere, have had the courage to expose offenders, detail violations, name names and seek justice. They have been met with a mixture of astonishment, empathy, identification, disbelief, derision and even contempt. All too often, the victims have been transformed into aggressors, denounced for everything from fueling women’s resistance to the dissemination of dangerous lies.

Sunday, November 19, 2017

Ever met a kid without a wish list? I have



Last year I ran for fifth grade student representative at my school. I made a few promises. If you vote for me, we’ll stock the bathrooms with softer toilet paper, rather than the stuff we get now. We’ll have more parties on Purim and definitely more sufganiyot on Chanukah. Fresh, sweet lemonade on hot days. More free time at recess. More treats! All these things seemed to me to be owed us. Rightfully ours. And as student rep, I would make sure it happened.

Our Love Affair With Digital Is Over

But real books, records and brick and mortar stores will take us back with open arms.


 A decade ago I bought my first smartphone, a clunky little BlackBerry 8830 that came in a sleek black leather sheath. I loved that phone. I loved the way it effortlessly slid in and out of its case, loved the soft purr it emitted when an email came in, loved the silent whoosh
 of its trackball as I played Brick Breaker on the subway and the feel of its baby keys clicking under my fat thumbs. It was the world in my hands, and when I had to turn it off, I felt anxious and alone.
 Like most relationships we plunge into with hearts aflutter, our love affair with digital technology promised us the world: more friends, money and democracy! Free music, news and same-day shipping of paper towels! A laugh a minute, and a constant party at our fingertips.

 Many of us bought into the fantasy that digital made everything better. We surrendered to this idea, and mistook our dependence for romance, until it was too late.

 Today, when my phone is on, I feel anxious and count down the hours to when I am able to turn it off and truly relax. The love affair I once enjoyed with digital technology is over — and I know I’m not alone
 Ten years after the iPhone first swept us off our feet, the growing mistrust of computers in both our personal lives and the greater society we live in is inescapable. This publishing season is flush with books raising alarms about digital technology’s pernicious effects on our lives: what smartphones are doing to our children; how Facebook and Twitter are eroding our democratic institutions; and the economic effects of tech monopolies.

 A recent Pew Research Center survey noted that more than 70 percent of Americans were worried about automation’s impact on jobs, while just 21 percent of respondents to a Quartz survey said they trust Facebook with their personal information. Nearly half of millennials worry about the negative effects of social media on their mental and physical health, according to the American Psychiatric Association.

 So what now? As much as we might fantasize about it, we probably won’t delete our social media accounts and toss our phones in the nearest body of water. What we can do is to restore some sense of balance over our relationship with digital technology, and the best way to do that is with analog: the ying to digital’s yang.

 Thankfully, the analog world is still here, and not only is it surviving but, in many cases, it is thriving. Sales of old-fashioned print books are up for the third year in a row, according to the Association of American Publishers, while ebook sales have been declining. Independent bookstores have been steadily expanding for several years. Vinyl records have witnessed a decade-long boom in popularity (more than 200,000 newly pressed records are sold each week in the United States), while sales of instant-film cameras, paper notebooks, board games and Broadway tickets are all growing again.

 This surprising reversal of fortune for these apparently “obsolete” analog technologies is too often written off as nostalgia for a predigital time. But younger consumers who never owned a turntable and have few memories of life before the internet drive most of the current interest in analog, and often include those who work in Silicon Valley’s most powerful companies.

 Analog, although more cumbersome and costly than its digital equivalents, provides a richness of experience that is unparalleled with anything delivered through a screen. People are buying books because a book engages nearly all of their senses, from the smell of the paper and glue to the sight of the cover design and weight of the pages read, the sound of those sheets turning, and even the subtle taste of the ink on your fingertips. A book can be bought and sold, given and received, and displayed on a shelf for anyone to see. It can start conversations and cultivate romances.

 The limits of analog, which were once seen as a disadvantage, are increasingly one of the benefits people are turning to as a counterweight to the easy manipulation of digital. Though a page of paper is limited by its physical size and the permanence of the ink that marks it, there is a powerful efficiency in that simplicity. The person holding the pen above that notebook page is free to write, doodle or scribble her idea however she wishes between those borders, without the restrictions or distractions imposed by software.

 In a world of endless email chains, group chats, pop-up messages or endlessly tweaked documents and images, the walled garden of analog saves both time and inspires creativity. Web designers at Google have been required to use pen and paper as a first step when brainstorming new projects for the past several years, because it leads to better ideas than those begun on a screen.

 In contrast with the virtual “communities” we have built online, analog actually contributes to the real places where we live. I have become friendly with Ian Cheung, the appropriately opinionated owner of June Records, up the street from my home in Toronto. I benefit not only from the tax revenues that June Records contributes as a local business (paving the roads, paying my daughter’s teachers) but also from living nearby. Like the hardware store, Italian grocer and butcher on the same block, the brick and mortar presence of June adds to my neighborhood’s sense of place (i.e., a place with a killer selection of Cannonball Adderley and local indie albums) and gives me a feeling of belonging. I also have no doubts that, unlike Twitter, Ian would immediately kick out any Nazi or raving misogynist who started ranting inside his store.

 Analog excels particularly well at encouraging human interaction, which is crucial to our physical and mental well-being. The dynamic of a teacher working in a classroom full of students has not only proven resilient, but has outperformed digital learning experiments time and again. Digital may be extremely efficient in transferring pure information, but learning happens best when we build upon the relationships between students, teachers and their peers.

 We do not face a simple choice of digital or analog. That is the false logic of the binary code that computers are programmed with, which ignores the complexity of life in the real world. Instead, we are faced with a decision of how to strike the right balance between the two. If we keep that in mind, we are taking the first step toward a healthy relationship with all technology, and, most important, one another.

 David Sax is the author of “The Revenge of Analog: Real Things and Why They Matter.”

ny times

If you want a sense of where Poland could be heading, look no further than the events last Saturday in Warsaw. Tens of thousands of people — many of them young men with crew cuts, but some parents with children, too — flocked to the Polish capital to celebrate Independence Day in a march organized in part by two neo-fascist organizations. They waved white and red Polish flags, they brandished burning torches, and they wore “white power” symbols. They carried banners declaring, “Death to enemies of the homeland,” and screamed, “Sieg Heil!” and “Ku Klux Klan!” The official slogan of the march was “We want God” — words from an old hymn that President Trump quoted during his speech in Warsaw in July. A dozen incredibly courageous women showed up to protest the march. After mixing with the marchers, they unraveled a long strip of cloth emblazoned with “Stop Fascism.” They were immediately attacked. Their banner was ripped apart. Marchers pushed some of the women to the ground and kicked others. Were these women exaggerating in calling the march fascist? Or are we in fact witnessing a resurgence of fascism in Poland? To steal a phrase: I believe the women. Continue reading the main story Race/Related Louisiana Man Freed After 45 Years as Conviction is Tossed Out NOV 17 Jay-Z: The Criminal Justice System Stalks Black People Like Meek Mill NOV 17 Ferdie Pacheco, ‘Fight Doctor’ for Muhammad Ali, Dies at 89 NOV 16 Review: ‘Mudbound’ Is a Racial Epic Tuned to Black Lives, and White Guilt NOV 16 East Ramapo School Elections Violate Voting Rights, Suit Claims NOV 16 See More » Though the Polish president, Andrzej Duda, condemned the march, saying Poland has no place for “sick nationalism,” the interior minister, Mariusz Blaszczak, called it “a beautiful sight.” He added: “We are proud that so many Poles have decided to take part in a celebration connected to the Independence Day holiday.” Given what transpired, this sounds shocking. But for those of us who follow Polish politics, the minister’s take didn’t come as a surprise.

Deputy foreign minister to speak at Chabad instead, laments 'silencing of Israeli democracy,' after students raise hackles over her hard-right views

Saturday, November 18, 2017

Poles Cry for ‘Pure Blood’ Again

ny times



If you want a sense of where Poland could be heading, look no further than the events last Saturday in Warsaw.
Tens of thousands of people — many of them young men with crew cuts, but some parents with children, too — flocked to the Polish capital to celebrate Independence Day in a march organized in part by two neo-fascist organizations. They waved white and red Polish flags, they brandished burning torches, and they wore “white power” symbols. They carried banners declaring, “Death to enemies of the homeland,” and screamed, “Sieg Heil!” and “Ku Klux Klan!”
The official slogan of the march was “We want God” — words from an old hymn that President Trump quoted during his speech in Warsaw in July.
A dozen incredibly courageous women showed up to protest the march. After mixing with the marchers, they unraveled a long strip of cloth emblazoned with “Stop Fascism.” They were immediately attacked. Their banner was ripped apart. Marchers pushed some of the women to the ground and kicked others.
Were these women exaggerating in calling the march fascist? Or are we in fact witnessing a resurgence of fascism in Poland? To steal a phrase: I believe the women.
Continue reading the main story
Though the Polish president, Andrzej Duda, condemned the march, saying Poland has no place for “sick nationalism,” the interior minister, Mariusz Blaszczak, called it “a beautiful sight.” He added: “We are proud that so many Poles have decided to take part in a celebration connected to the Independence Day holiday.”
Given what transpired, this sounds shocking. But for those of us who follow Polish politics, the minister’s take didn’t come as a surprise.

The trial of the doctors from hell

https://www.heyoya.com/social/showComment?commentId=191064&pageId=169931



Nazi atrocities remembered.

Franken Case Sets Off Debate Over Line Between Abuse and a Mistake

ny timres



A day after the latest in a dizzying series of sexual assault revelations enveloped Senator Al Franken and rattled the Capitol, politicians and comedians were left trying to assess the line between predatory behavior and an inexcusable mistake, as calls mounted for him to resign.
Mr. Franken, Democrat of Minnesota and a veteran of both comedy and politics — two industries under increased scrutiny for fostering cultures where sexual abuse is pervasive — was targeted by Republicans, including President Trump, who has himself been accused by multiple women of sexual harassment and assault. Republicans are grappling with their own senatorial scandal, as Roy S. Moore pursues a Senate seat amid accusations of assaulting teenage girls.
But that did not diminish their zeal as they called on Mr. Franken to step down.
On Twitter, Mr. Trump publicly hinted at a pattern of assault, and the political fallout continued as two Minnesota candidates for governor, both Democrats, called on Mr. Franken to resign. The conservative writer and activist L. Brent Bozell III said Mr. Franken had been “caught red-handed conducting lewd and unacceptable behavior,” adding, “there is a pervert in the United States Senate.”
By Friday evening, Mr. Franken had canceled a coming appearance at a book fair in Miami.
But while there was no widespread public showing of support for Mr. Franken, a number of his allies, including three former “Saturday Night Live” colleagues and 10 former aides, all women, said that they did not believe his behavior fit a pattern or was in the same realm of misconduct as other high-profile men accused of sexual abuse in the entertainment industry, including the comedian Louis C. K. and the producer Harvey Weinstein.
“I’m just so upset about this atmosphere and good people being dragged into it,” said Jane Curtin, a member of the original cast of “Saturday Night Live” with Mr. Franken from 1975 to 1980 who has been close with him since. “It’s just like the red menace. You don’t know who’s going to be next.”
Continue reading the main story
Ms. Curtin said that in a comedy setting where women were at times not valued or dismissed because of their gender, Mr. Franken was a powerful ally who viewed female writers and comedians as his equal. But she was also among several who said they were disappointed by Mr. Franken’s conduct and were struggling with the episode, which happened during his comedy career.
“I was surprised,” Ms. Curtin said. “If he did that, that’s really stupid, but I have never seen him in a situation where he has been sexually aggressive with anybody.”
Others, including the woman who said he forcibly kissed her during a 2006 U.S.O. tour of the Middle East, grappled with his expressions of remorse. The woman, Leeann Tweeden, read an apology from the senator during a Friday appearance on the “The View.”
In another appearance, on ABC’s “Good Morning America,” Ms. Tweeden, a radio newscaster, said she had not told her story for political gain, and that his fate was up to the people of Minnesota to decide. She said she wanted women to feel more comfortable to share their experiences.
“Because if he did this to somebody else, or if anybody else has stayed silent, or anybody else has been the victim of any kind of abuse, maybe they can speak out and feel like they can come forward in real time and not wait a decade or longer,” she said.
As Washington wrestled with how to categorize Mr. Franken’s behavior, which was accompanied by a photo that showed him appearing to grope Ms. Tweeden as she slept on a military plane, even some ardent defenders of women’s rights said the senator’s offense was not so grievous as to require his resignation.

Thursday, November 16, 2017

barry_schwartz_using_our_practical_wisdom

Toldos; If One Knows His Child Will Be A Rashah...



ny times


GADSDEN, Ala. — Alabama’s increasingly bizarre Senate race was convulsed again as four more women came forward on Wednesday to describe encounters with the Republican candidate, Roy S. Moore, and Mr. Moore’s campaign sharply questioned the credibility of another accuser.
The newest accusations came from women who ranged in age from about 18 to 28 at the time. They complained of being groped, forcibly kissed or subjected to unwanted advances.
One of them, Becky Gray, now 62, a retired teacher living in Gadsden, Ala., said in an interview that she was puzzled by Mr. Moore’s repeated overtures when she worked in the Gadsden Mall.
“I just couldn’t figure out why a man of his age spent every Friday and Saturday at the mall,” said Ms. Gray, who was then in her late teens or early 20s.
She said she frequently saw Mr. Moore, then in his 30s, talking with young women and did her best to avoid him. Ms. Gray said she eventually complained to her manager that he would not leave her alone and was later told that Mr. Moore had been banned from the mall.

Toldos; If One Knows His Child Will Be A Rashah...




The Brisker Rav famously explains, that Rivkah Imeinu - as a woman that does not have the מצוה of פרו ורבו- was able to say למה זה אנכי... A man on the other hand has no such liberty. That is why, explains the Brisker Rav, Chizkiyahu Hamelech, was told by Yishayahu Hanavi that he must get married. This, despite his having a valid reason for staying single- he knew he would have a son, a Rashah - Menashe Hamelech. 

Rav Chaim Shaul Kaufman זצוק''ל, in his ספר משחת שמן, asks from the נשי למך. They were woman and yet they were told that they should not refrain from having children...

For questions and comments please email salmahshleima@gmail.com


Rogochover and More by Marc B. Shapiro

Marc B. Shapiro

In a recent Jewish Review of Books (Summer 2017), I published a translation of an interview R. Joseph Rozin, the Rogochover, gave to the New York Yiddish paper, Der morgen zhurnal. You can see the original interview here. The fact that the Rogochover agreed to the interview is itself significant. As is to be expected, the content of the interview is also of great interest.

In the preface to the interview, I mentioned that the Rogochover famously studied Torah on Tisha be-Av and when he was an avel, both of which are in violation of accepted halakhah. When he was once asked why, while sitting shiva, he learnt Torah, he is reported to have replied:[1]

ודאי, עבירה היא זו, וכשאקבל עונש על שאר עונותי יענישוני אף על עון זה, אבל אני אקבל באהבה וברצון את העונש על חטא זה, וכדאית היא התורה להלקות עליה

R. Yissachar Tamar cites an eye-witness who reported that the Rogochover said basically the same thing in explaining why he learnt on Tisha be-Av, and noted how wonderful it will be to be punished for studying Torah.[2]

ומה נעים לקבל צליפות על עסק התורה

The Hazon Ish was told that the Rogochover learnt Torah when he was in mourning and that he made another antinomian-like comment in justification of his behavior, namely, that he wants to be in the gehinom of those who learn Torah. The Hazon Ish replied that “this gehinom is the same gehinom for the other sins.”[3]

The various comments quoted in the name of the Rogochover show his great need for studying Torah, a need that simply did not allow him to put aside his Torah study, even when halakhah required it. Yet the antinomian implication of the Rogochover’s comments was too much to be ignored. R. Gavriel Zinner’s reaction after quoting the Rogochover is how many felt.[4]

Tuesday, November 14, 2017

Williamsburg man busted for repeatedly raping pre-teen member of extended family

NY Daily News

An 18-year-old Brooklyn man raped a pre-teen member of his extended family, authorities said Monday.

Police arrested David Teitelbaum late Sunday and charged him with rape, sex abuse and acting in a manner injurious to a child younger than 17.

Teitelbaum, who has no previous arrest record, was arraigned on $15,000 cash bail Monday night.

His defense attorney denied all the allegations, noting that his client has no history of trouble with the law.

"He's a full time student," said defense attorney Israel Friend.

"And from what I was told, the complaining witness' mom doesn't want to go forward with the charges," he added.

A source familiar with the case also said the victim’s parents had stopped cooperating with police, fearful of the shame the incident will cause the family.

Prosecutors said the accused was 17 at the time of the alleged rape a year ago.

The incident occurred during the holidays while the families were visiting, and the adults were asleep.

Prosecutors said Teitelbaum pulled his pants down to expose himself to the girl and then penetrated her.

In another incident, Teitelbaum touched the girl over her skirt, the prosecutor said.

Authorities said the girl told her mother, and then later told a therapist.

The therapist didn't initially report the allegations to police. But when the therapist was told last month that the two families would be getting together again for the holidays, the police were notified.

The girl, whose age and relationship to the victim are being withheld to protect her identity, was attacked inside the suspect’s Williamsburg apartment, sources said.

At some point the girl told her mother the suspect had touched her inappropriately, but the family didn't alert the police, sources said.

“The guy rapes their daughter and they’re protecting him — unbelievable” said the source. “I can’t even imagine how angry I’d be if it was my daughter.”

After the therapist notified the NYPD, the Child Abuse Squad launched an investigation.

Monday, November 13, 2017

Chayei Sarah; Did Avrohom Avinu, Muzzle His Animals?




Published on Nov 9, 2017
Rashi in this weeks Parshah, quotes the Medrash Rabba twice that Avrohom Avinu's animals always had their distinct muzzle. However the Ramban shows that the second Medrash that Raashi quotes, seems to move away from that Pshat, and seems to conclude that they were NOT muzzled. How did Rashi understand that Medrash?... Why did the Medrash argue that there was no muzzle, only after it was mentioned twice?!... For questions and comments please email salmahshleima@gmail.com

V

forward


I remember the moment distinctly, and it was almost a decade ago: a group of stylish women walked into the main sanctuary of my shul in Baltimore for a Torah class. They all had a similar panache about them, sporting long, curled sheitels (wigs) that reached mid-back, large designer handbags slung over the shoulders, and outfits that were trendy, expensive-looking and mainly black. I stood at the side of the room and observed something that was clearly a new “look.” I had never seen religious women look like this before (living outside of NY most certainly contributed). Sure, religious women always have worn expensive clothes and lots of black. But it was the sheitels — they now were the accessory that put it all together. And they were so long.


V




Jerusalem – Israeli Rabbis Tell IDF Chief Women Are Weakening The Army

.vosizneias


Jerusalem – A group of leading Orthodox rabbis met with the Israeli army’s chief of staff to complain. According to Israel’s Arutz Sheva news website, the rabbis told Gadi Eisenkot on Tuesday that the growing ranks of female combat soldiers in the Israel Defense Forces are creating an immodest environment. They demanded changes to accommodate [...]
V

Never forget the Har Nof massacre

arutz 7


We used to feel safe.
We used to think that Har Nof was just another frum community in Yerushalayim.
But three years ago, everything that we thought was normal was shattered.
Terrorists stormed into our synagogue, our Mikdash Me’at, brutally slaughtering the bodies and stealing the Neshamos of Tzadikim wrapped in Talis and Tefilin.

Thursday, November 2, 2017

I Want ‘Allahu Akbar’ Back

ny time

Allahu akbar. It’s Arabic for “God is greatest.” Muslims, an eccentric tribe with over a billion members, say it several times in our five daily prayers. The phrase is also a convenient way to express just the right kind of gratitude in any situation.

I say “Allahu akbar” out loud more than 100 times a day. Yesterday, I uttered it several times during my late-evening Isha prayer. Earlier, during dinner, I said it with my mouth full after biting into my succulent halal chicken kebab. In the afternoon, I dropped it in a conference room at the State Department, where I’d been invited to address a packed room of government employees about the power of storytelling. Specifically, I expressed my continuing gratitude for the election of Barack Obama, whom, in a joking nod to the Islamophobic paranoia that surrounded him, I called “our first Muslim American president,” adding “Allahu akbar!”

People in the crowd laughed and applauded, the world continued to spin, no one had an aneurysm, and only a few people seemed to wonder with arched, Sarah Sanders-like eyebrows, “Wait, is he ...?” I even confess to saying “Allahu akbar” two days ago in a restroom after losing the battle, but ultimately winning the war, against a nasty stomach virus.

I’m 37 years old. In all those years, I, like an overwhelming majority of Muslims, have never uttered “Allahu akbar” before or after committing a violent act. Unfortunately, terrorists like ISIS and Al Qaeda and their sympathizers, who represent a tiny fraction of Muslims, have. In the public imagination, this has given the phrase meaning that’s impossible to square with what it represents in my daily life.


Former Fugitive Rabbi Berland to Be Released From Israeli Jail Today

Eliezer Berland was convicted of sexual assault and prosecutors have decided not to appeal a decision granting him early release after five months.
haaretz

Trying the Feldenkrais Method for Chronic Pain

ny times


After two hourlong sessions focused first on body awareness and then on movement retraining at the Feldenkrais Institute of New York, I understood what it meant to experience an incredible lightness of being. Having, temporarily at least, released the muscle tension that aggravates my back and hip pain, I felt like I was walking on air.
I had long refrained from writing about this method of countering pain because I thought it was some sort of New Age gobbledygook with no scientific basis. Boy, was I wrong!

Seven Bizarre Notions Trump and His Team Have About America

ny times



President Trump, his motley crew of White House and cabinet ideologues, and many other Republicans claim to have a better understanding of American values, traditions and history than the rest of us. They are the “real Americans,” as the historically illiterate Sarah Palin loved to say many times a day.

But a great many of their notions about America are deeply puzzling at best and, at worst, truly scary ideas infused with racism and intolerance of dissent.

The list defies comprehensive accounting. (Time magazine has to keep updating a handy guide to the world according to Trump that it started after his first 100 days in office.) But here are some of my favorites.

The Civil War: Back in August, after racists marched in Charlottesville to defend monuments to those who fought to preserve slavery, Trump’s lawyer, John Dowd, forwarded around an email saying that there was “literally no difference” between George Washington and Robert E. Lee.

More recently, John Kelly, the White House chief of staff, told Laura Ingraham on Fox News that the “lack of an ability to compromise led to the Civil War.”

Continue reading the main story

Andrew Rosenthal
Politics, technology, national security, popular culture and whatever else seems interesting, important or just funny.
The F.B.I.’s Black Phantom Menace
OCT 19
Trump’s Self-Absorption on War Deaths
OCT 17
Trump’s Latest Outrage Against Puerto Rico
OCT 12
The N.F.L.’s Workplace Dodge
OCT 11
The Debate That Goes Nowhere
OCT 4
See More »

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There's much commentary here about the big compromises in our history and whether the Civil War was about secession or slavery. But,...
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Mr. Rosenthal, it doesn't matter what you, or other elites think about what Trump says, because he is speaking to his base, and only his...
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What possible compromise could there have been over slavery? But it’s also false history. There were plenty of “compromises.” All of them enshrined the evil institution of slavery and made the civil war more likely, not less.

It might be tempting to write Kelly’s remarks off as the ravings of a man whose boss must drive him crazy on a daily basis and who had earlier talked of a mythical time when women in America were held “sacred” (by blocking their career aspirations and paying them less than men, denying them birth control and access to abortions, and refusing them the right to vote for more than a half-century after the Civil War).

But Trump’s press secretary, Sarah Huckabee Sanders, picked up Kelly’s false history the next day. There was, she said, “pretty strong consensus” among people from “the left, the right, the North and the South” that a failure to compromise caused the war.

Questioning the military: Kelly, a retired four-star Marine general, lied on Oct. 19 about a speech given by Representative Frederica Wilson of Florida when he was making his defense of Trump’s conversation with the widow of an American soldier.

Asked about that later, Sanders said, “If you want to go after General Kelly, that’s up to you, but I think if you want to get into a debate with a four-star Marine general, I think that’s something highly inappropriate.”