Weinstein was found dead in her car on Sunday after years of estrangement from her Gerrer hassidic family, and her story continues to make waves in Israeli public discourse. The circumstances surrounding the tragic event have sparked debate about the Gerrer hassidic community, its social norms and practices (especially as pertains to the treatment of women), and attitudes within religious circles to those who leave religious observance.
Weinstein left a will explaining her reasons for taking her own life and a tell-all book about her life story. She accuses the Gerrer community of forbidding her children from having any contact with her once she left religious observance, and cites the disconnect from her family as the main cause of her emotional suffering, leading to her suicide. Many in the press have put the blame for the tragedy squarely on Weinstein's family and the Gerrer hassidic and wider haredi community in general. The veteran channel 10 reporter thinks this is grossly unfair.[...]
Ben-Haim opens with his impressions from the funeral itself:
"This is what injustice looks like. We came to Esti Weinstein's funeral today expecting to meet her evil and cold-hearted family and instead met a noble and sensitive family, we heard a eulogy from a loving haredi father and an explanation and request for forgiveness from a hurting haredi daughter.
"All of this means that we need to rewrite the entire story of the past 48 hours and tell the truth: everything you heard about the wickedness of the haredi side was a lie."
The Channel 10 reporter then goes into detail, discussing individual claims made in the press, going point by point through the events, in chronological order:
"Something about this seemed fishy to me from the beginning. First it was claimed that the haredi family members were going to snatch the body to bury it on their own terms. I called and spoke with the family. They were shocked by the idea, 'Of course not! Heaven forbid!'. I don't need to tell you that no one actually tried to snatch the body.
"Next they said that Weinstein's daughters broke off contact from their mother because of a cruel order from the Admor [leader of a hassidic community]. I called again, I spoke with the family, and they swore that there was no directive from the Admor and explained that this was not a religious issue at all, merely a human one. The girls were angry at their beloved mother who simply up and left them one day 7 years ago. Hence the estrangement.
"Afterwards they said that the haredim are demanding she be buried outside of the cemetery walls. I called, spoke with the family, and they were shocked by the idea, 'she was a good mother, we love her. We never had any such plans.'
"Then they said that they don't intend to sit Shiva [week-long mourning period in Jewish law] for Esti. I called, spoke with the family, they were shocked by that idea too. No such thing had ever crossed their minds.
"Next, they said that the family is demanding a small and quick haredi funeral that will demean Esti's memory. I called. Spoke with the family. They said this was untrue and that they had every intention of honoring their late mother's wishes, having already made clear that they have no problem with there being flowers and songs at the funeral [as per Weinstein's instructions in her will].
"Then the courts were petitioned to make sure that the funeral will be held with a secular atmosphere (not that songs and flowers really make a funeral 'secular'), and it was reported that the secular side won as the court ruled against the haredi family. But the haredi family never sent anyone to the hearing to contest any of this and wasn't even part of any fight. They didn't want to fight about this and there was no need to 'beat them' in court, for as I've already written, the family wanted to honor Esti's non-haredi wishes.
"After that, it was claimed that the family was boycotting the funeral, which would indeed be the height of cruelty. But then... well, then we saw a large group of haredi Gerrer hassidic women arriving at the funeral, sobbing, and sad Gerrer hassidic men, all standing to the side, quietly and politely, and waiting for the time when they will be able to take part in the proceedings. We heard the father eulogizing his daughter, and the eldest daughter Raheli eulogizing her mother. No haredi told Raheli that she wasn't allowed to speak in this kind of forum because she's a girl.
"It was then that I understood that this week, a grave injustice was committed among the Jewish people." [...]
Ben-Haim's post ends with a quote of the full text of Weinstein's eldest daughter's eulogy, excerpts from which were available before the funeral and were published by Arutz Sheva.
This story is so heartbreaking. Noone is to judge a yiddishe Mama whose children are torn from her. She swallowed so much garbage and carried the blame to protect them and their reputation, so that noone would know what a pervert heir father is. it is a mother who rather absorb the pan and hurt so that her children don't. This is a story of some very evil people who pushed her to this. It is highly unlikely she would have left the community she grew up in and married in, if they had shown her some support in getting away from an evil man. But he had the $$$ business and money. She was left penniless but for the clothing on her back. And now those evil people rather than take responsibility for what they did, chalk it up to her mental state. Yes, she tells them as it is -- they pushed her over the edge, they drove her crazy. By the end, she says she knows she was no longer sane. The damage had been done. But there is justice.... even though it sometimes seems to take its time... this woman's soul is surely at peace and with the very righteous. But for all her suffering, for those who hurt her, and tore her babes from her, there will never be any peace. In time their branches to the Jewish people will be cut off, just as they cut off this woman from her seven branches. Call it what it is -- avoda zora. They are all idol worshippers.
ReplyDeleteWhy are you blaming Esty for ruining her daughter? Maybe this daughter woke up and saw the religious hypocrisy of her father.
ReplyDeleteDo you think the pervert stopped acting out his perversions just because his wife ran away and said she refuse to be part of his toevah? Do you really believe the pervert was suddenly healed? Or maybe he continued in other forms that this daughter was privy to.
So much goes on behind closed doors that most will never know. And people don't necessarily owe the public an accounting, in order for them to understand. Just because you don't know, doesn't mean it didn't happen. And if you think you deserve an accounting, I might suggest you go handle your own perverted interest in other people's bedrooms with a psychiatrist.
Esti Weinstein made this a public spectacle and then you criticize people for commenting?!
ReplyDeleteher children were not torn from her - she deserted them! She clearly was not interested in protecting anyone's repuation - including her own. He biography can only be understood as a desire to hurt her children.
ReplyDeleteYou are simply making a lot of conjecture without any evidence. Someone who tries to commit suicide is not in the best of mental health.
in short your screed is nonsense
It makes sense that she either induced her daughter to stray or supported her in it because she went to live with her mother when all the other children did not. I don't know the absolute truth an either do you. However, I tend to go with logic rather than overweening misplaced rachmonus. However, Hashem Yisborach will decide and it's not up to us. Humans can only judge by what is apparent and she surely was only able to live her non religious lifestyle while together with her mother.
ReplyDeleteIf you have a problem with the probable truth, see a competent Orthodox rabbi.