Is the claim of mekach taus dependent on producing a named syndrome that corresponds with the symptoms, or merely with the symptoms? I.e., suppose a husband has a pre-existing habit of fighting with people, or an anger problem. The wife finds out after marriage that he has always been this way. Does it matter what the official name of the diagnosis is?
Pre-existing or post-existing habits of fighting and/or anger is highly insufficient to either force him to divorce her or to annul the marriage based on mekach taos.
There is a difference between incurable and untreatable. Even something "uncurable" can generally be treated to make the symptoms tolerable.
Also, wasn't the so-called rofeh mumche here essentially paid to come to the conclusion he came to and wasn't he sought out specifically as someone who would cooperate with the desired diagnosis (and anyone who wouldn't agree to that diagnosis, or came to the wrong diagnosis, was ignored and thus no one would be aware?
A lot of good comments here. My point is that even if the doctor made a one-sided diagnosis based on her side of story, but clearly she was in great distress over certain behaviors he had. Look, the whole situation is very sad. I don't know why they couldn't work out a normal get.
However, in the news are other cases, including a guy who disappeared and changed his name, and ran away for 8 years, and another guy who ran off for 25 years to Uruguay or something. This is completely intolerable that any person could be metzaer another like that. If Chazal were misaken an entire gezeira of sandal hamesumar because of one incident, it is barur that the Rabbonim must fix this problem now. If mekach taus is the vehicle, so be it. It bothers me when a teshuva states that it seems to be correct to annul in a certain case at hand, but we lack a mesorah to do so. It reminds me of the gemara gittin, anvensanuso shel rebbe (???) hachariva es beis mikdasheinu, vhiglisanu lvein haumos. Sometimes one has to step up to the plate.
"This is completely intolerable that any person could be metzaer another like that."
We don't need any new vehicles - we just need real Bais Din. Humanity has an endless capacity for good and bad. Each case has to be judged ob its individual merits or else you get mayhem.
There are people that rub and steal, will you be mesakin that anybody accused of robbery loses his right to due process and goes straight to jail for 30 yrs as a deterrent?
This specific story screams FRAUD!
The easiest way to get some balance is to picture yourself - presumably as a reasonable person - in the exact same position of husband / wife.
Your point of the womens' real distress is extremely important. Everything I've heard is that often small doubts become very real specifically because of the type of therapy and support - which doesn't value perspective taking. I'm no prophet, but I thing there's a good chance that had tamar seen a therapist who interpreted Aharon's character differently (which I hinted in my last comment) her distress would have dissipated, since she wouldn't have felt so trapped.
Is the claim of mekach taus dependent on producing a named syndrome that corresponds with the symptoms, or merely with the symptoms? I.e., suppose a husband has a pre-existing habit of fighting with people, or an anger problem. The wife finds out after marriage that he has always been this way. Does it matter what the official name of the diagnosis is?
ReplyDeletePre-existing or post-existing habits of fighting and/or anger is highly insufficient to either force him to divorce her or to annul the marriage based on mekach taos.
ReplyDeleteThere is a difference between incurable and untreatable. Even something "uncurable" can generally be treated to make the symptoms tolerable.
ReplyDeleteAlso, wasn't the so-called rofeh mumche here essentially paid to come to the conclusion he came to and wasn't he sought out specifically as someone who would cooperate with the desired diagnosis (and anyone who wouldn't agree to that diagnosis, or came to the wrong diagnosis, was ignored and thus no one would be aware?
A lot of good comments here. My point is that even if the doctor made a one-sided diagnosis based on her side of story, but clearly she was in great distress over certain behaviors he had. Look, the whole situation is very sad. I don't know why they couldn't work out a normal get.
ReplyDeleteHowever, in the news are other cases, including a guy who disappeared and changed his name, and ran away for 8 years, and another guy who ran off for 25 years to Uruguay or something. This is completely intolerable that any person could be metzaer another like that. If Chazal were misaken an entire gezeira of sandal hamesumar because of one incident, it is barur that the Rabbonim must fix this problem now. If mekach taus is the vehicle, so be it. It bothers me when a teshuva states that it seems to be correct to annul in a certain case at hand, but we lack a mesorah to do so. It reminds me of the gemara gittin, anvensanuso shel rebbe (???) hachariva es beis mikdasheinu, vhiglisanu lvein haumos. Sometimes one has to step up to the plate.
"This is completely intolerable that any person could be metzaer another like that."
ReplyDeleteWe don't need any new vehicles - we just need real Bais Din.
Humanity has an endless capacity for good and bad. Each case has to be judged ob its individual merits or else you get mayhem.
There are people that rub and steal, will you be mesakin that anybody accused of robbery loses his right to due process and goes straight to jail for 30 yrs as a deterrent?
This specific story screams FRAUD!
The easiest way to get some balance is to picture yourself - presumably as a reasonable person - in the exact same position of husband / wife.
Your point of the womens' real distress is extremely important. Everything I've heard is that often small doubts become very real specifically because of the type of therapy and support - which doesn't value perspective taking.
I'm no prophet, but I thing there's a good chance that had tamar seen a therapist who interpreted Aharon's character differently (which I hinted in my last comment) her distress would have dissipated, since she wouldn't have felt so trapped.