https://mishpacha.com/your-map-to-a-better-marriage-part-1/
But the bigger picture is to accept is that you did not choose your husband. Hashem chose him for you. Out of every possible prospect in the entire world, Hashem determined that this person is the perfect match for you. Hashem knows you far better than you know you, and Hashem knows far better than you what is for your best. In His infinite wisdom, He determined that this is the ideal spouse for you. When you focus on the issue from this perspective, I think you’ll find it much easier to accept your husband for who he is.
You write that your disappointment nags at you and makes you unhappy. Those thoughts are a trick of the Satan. He wants you to be miserable and resentful. He doesn’t want your marriage to reach its potential. Whenever that notion pops up, try to replace it with another thought: “Hashem runs the world. Hashem knows better than I what is for my best. He alone made my shidduch. We are a perfect match.”
Is it Adar already? time flies!
ReplyDelete" Your perception isn't accurate. Your brain doesn't work properly. Your emotions are out of whack. Your discomfort isn't legitimate because Hashem IS comfortable. You need to dig deep and find a way to not only be ok with this mismatch but also find the joy necessary to nurture the relationship, the one and only perfect match that Hashem has picked just for you. Don't disappoint Hashem and the rest of the world by backing out of this basic responsibility. Try to see the bright side, the silver lining. Hashem doesn't make mistakes".
ReplyDeleteI recognize this type of abusive language very well.
Hashem should guide us to live a Torah life b'nachas with someone that brings out our fullest potential; which can be one of many.
>Hashem chose him for you.
ReplyDeleteBovine faeces. A great line for people who want to avoid taking any responsibility for the free will that HaShem actually gave them.