Child Abuse - How do we speed up progress?

Baruch HaShem we have seen significant progress in dealing with sexual abuse. Only a few short years we all knew that child abuse either didn't exist or wasn't a serious problem. The learned amongst us knew that it could only be dealt with by rabbis after two witnesses testified that sodomy or rape of a doreissa level had occurred. The crime of sexual abuse was viewed as a moral one – in which the psychological consequences were assumed to be insignificant. No one heard of post-traumatic stress syndrome. Everyone knew that the molester was some weird psychopathic stranger and therefore there was nothing to fear from the kind neighbor, charismatic teacher or wonderful father. Who knew about the complex and conflicting feelings evoked by a beloved teacher who groomed a child for abuse. No one could believe that a child would keep coming back to the abuser who was molesting them. No one understood that abuse caused suppression of memories that only appear years later. We all "knew" that if abuse was happening it would be reported immediate by an outraged child. Failure to even tell one's parents or teacher immediately was viewed as proof that the accusations were false. 

The police were never called because of the horrific sin of Mesira - which is such a heinous crime that it causes the loss of Olam HaBah (Rosh HaShanna 17a). Who would dare risk violating the complex laws of lashon harah as explained by the Chofetz Chaim? In fact the issue of sexual abuse was viewed by the average parent or teacher as being so complex that only gedolim could know how to deal with the issue. We of course knew that the prime consequence of abuse was damaged to prospective shidduchim for the whole family. Other harmful consequences of abuse involved ruining the reputation of a yeshiva or causing a chilul HaShem. However we really weren't worried about abuse – because it was such a rare occurrence like being struck by lightning after winning the lottery. We of course were comforted by the assumption that the watchful eyes of the gedolim were protecting our kids from this scourge – and would never ever allow anyone to harm the hair of a single kid – and surely would not knowingly keep a child molester as a teacher or camp counselor for decades. After all didn't they have the ruach hakodesh of Daas Torah that they indoctrinated us to believe gave them insight and understanding way beyond that of a mere parent?  Aside from that we all knew that the rabbis followed G-d's Torah fearlessly and they would never be afraid to stand up to pressure from the community and peers. I mean everyone knows that fearlessness in proclaiming the halacha is itself a Torah command (Devarim 1:16).  

Major changes started in 2006-2007. Rabbi Zweibel of the Aguda readily acknowledged that the gedolim had been ignoring the problem ("it was on the back burner") until it came to the public awareness through the secular media (N.Y. Magazine "Do Orthodox Jews have a Catholic Church problem?) as well as blogs and a number of organizations. Child abuse has moved from an issue which was never mentioned in public to one that even Rabbi Perlow - the head of the Aguda - has publicly acknowledged at an Aguda Convention.

The major accomplishment of this phase was the mere fact that abuse was acknowledged publicly as a significant problem. Additionally it was beginning to be acknowledged that covering up abuse (contrary to the public statement by Rabbi Mattisyahu Solomon) – was not only not a good idea – but that due to the secular media and internet – it really was impossible to "sweep things under the rug".  The Baltimore rabbis collectively issued a proclamation in 2007 in which they acknowledged that a serious problem existed and that they were not competent to deal with it.

While all of this is important, it is not my primary focus in this article. I did not mention recent events to provide a history lesson in the dynamics of our community. All of this is a necessary introduction of a very important question.

The question is - What do we need to work on to speed up the processes of change within our communities and within ourselves? How do we give victims of abuse the courage to come forth? How do we prevent abuse? What is the best way to comfort and heal the survivors of abuse and their families? (I met someone over Rosh HaShanna who confided to me that he had been abused as a child and now – 30 years later – despite intensive therapy he and his family still suffered terribly every day.) How do we get our rabbis, educational and community leaders to have the courage to deal with the issue? How do we get them to understand what action halacha demands of them – rather than what is the fastest way to cover up the facts? 

In short – what is the best way to finish the revolution of dealing with sexual abuse? Suggestions are welcome!

Update: 9/16/13 One important issue is that it is necessary to change how we think about abuse. It is not that enough to say that it is wrong and needs to be stopped. It is necessary to understand on the most elementary level that abuse is harming another person and that can not be tolerated. See Simon Sinek regarding the greater importance of why we do things than what we do.