do we REALLY think this will even make a dent in the problem??
maybe we should let our children spend some time with their parents and families instead of shipping them off to sleep away yeshiva and camp just as they are reaching puberty.
The whole system is designed to indoctrinate our children into a culture of sexual abuse.
Finally something that makes a difference AND is halachicly correct. It doesn't promote mesirah, like the MO, and it does promote respect for one's body.
The problem is not much that children do not tell their parents about it, the problem is that rabbis and communities leaders choose to protect the molesters instead of the children and more often that not, it is the molested child family to forced to move while the molester stays and enjoys the new children he can molest
Promote mesirah? MO? Does that make Rav Elyashiv, Rav Sternbuch, the Shulchan Aruch, the Rashba and the Ramabam all MO for stating unequivocally that there is no mesirah when it comes to a rodef? And if you still need convincing that a child molester is a rodef, then speak to a few survivors of child sexual abuse. You have some nerve slipping in your ignorant "MO" remark on this blog especially, after Rabbi Eidensohn's work on these halachos. I'm surprised the rabbi hasn't taken you to task yet. People like you give chizuk to the molesters to keep on victimizing children, since only "MO's" will turn them in.
This piece fills a sorely needed gap. The efforts to combat abuse & molestation by educating the adults are progressing very slowly. Meanwhile, there are precious neshamos being harmed. I choose not to get sucked into the fanaticism of how evil our leaders are, or how corrupt. That bitterness, even if justified, has no benefit, and won't save a single child. Educating the children is clearly effective, needs to be done more widely, and should be carried out in print, broadcast, and didactic manners.
Bracha has done a great service to the klal.
There truly is progress on other fronts, though admittedly is too slow. The sour grapes that characterizes too much of the discussion is shameful, and does nothing to protect children. This brief article by Bracha does accomplish.
...but anyway, I do think that the issue of preventing sexual abuse is very, very complex.
Sexual abuse happens on chassidic girls who learned never even to talk to a man, let alont undress in front of him, let alone have sexual intercourse: it is very much a question of power and abuse of power.
I don't think that this well-meaning ad-campaign will do anything to help...
Shoteh, the charges don't have to be proven. Raglayim Ladavor is sufficient. Also, when the victim himself is doing the reporting, how can you tell them that the charges are unproven? According to you, a child molester can never be reported unless he performs his despicable acts in front of two kosher witnesses. The way you pervert the halacha is what has led us to the sorry state we are in. As for teaching kids about "good touch, bad touch", yes, it is important for them to be aware. However, this will not deter the molesters. They are not afraid of your pamphlets. The only thing they fear is hard jail time.
I'm no spokesman, but Agudah has no position on this. There is a criteria of raglayim ledovor, as is mentioned in all the teshuvos, including that of Rav Elyashiv. It does not say that this determination must be made by a Rav. However, inasmuch as the outcome of the determination is the implementation of a halacha, which is a double edge sword, no one sees another way. No, you do not need kosher witnesses to make a complaint. You might need that to pasken. The issue here is not a bais din ruling on the molestation charge; it is the permitting of the next step to go to secular courts. While not a simple matter, there is a dire need for some conclusion on this. The touting of the "mesira" line is clearly being abused in the name of "holiness", which has disastrous effects.
It sounds unfair to tell the poskim to produce a psak that states that reporting should always be permitted (leaving them with an a priori psak to then justify), but that is what we have been doing. It is sometimes about protecting the alleged perpetrator, but that can be suggested for specific cases, not the general shailoh.
I just don't see a problem with wanting a blanket psak for people to go straight to the police on the matter of child molestation.
If a child says something happened, take him to a social worker at CPS and let them help you decide if it requires reporting. If the secular people say, yes, this is child molestation, then file an official report.
What are you asking from the rabbonim? That they should become social workers, investigators, and child sexual abuse experts? Do we call in the rabbonim on a rape case? I should hope we take the rape victim straight to the hospital, even if the rapist was her father,brother,or uncle. There is no shailah here, child molestation is complex and it is not for the rabbonim to deal with.
What the rabbonim should be doing is encouraging any and all victims to come forward when there is a case pending against a suspected pedophile.
do we REALLY think this will even make a dent in the problem??
ReplyDeletemaybe we should let our children spend some time with their parents and families instead of shipping them off to sleep away yeshiva and camp just as they are reaching puberty.
The whole system is designed to indoctrinate our children into a culture of sexual abuse.
Finally something that makes a difference AND is halachicly correct. It doesn't promote mesirah, like the MO, and it does promote respect for one's body.
ReplyDeleteKol Hakovod to Bracha Goetz.
The problem is not much that children do not tell their parents about it, the problem is that rabbis and communities leaders choose to protect the molesters instead of the children and more often that not, it is the molested child family to forced to move while the molester stays and enjoys the new children he can molest
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't promote mesirah, like the MO
ReplyDeletePromote mesirah? MO? Does that make Rav Elyashiv, Rav Sternbuch, the Shulchan Aruch, the Rashba and the Ramabam all MO for stating unequivocally that there is no mesirah when it comes to a rodef? And if you still need convincing that a child molester is a rodef, then speak to a few survivors of child sexual abuse. You have some nerve slipping in your ignorant "MO" remark on this blog especially, after Rabbi Eidensohn's work on these halachos. I'm surprised the rabbi hasn't taken you to task yet. People like you give chizuk to the molesters to keep on victimizing children, since only "MO's" will turn them in.
None of them allow mesirah on an accused, but unproven, charges.
ReplyDeleteThis piece fills a sorely needed gap. The efforts to combat abuse & molestation by educating the adults are progressing very slowly. Meanwhile, there are precious neshamos being harmed. I choose not to get sucked into the fanaticism of how evil our leaders are, or how corrupt. That bitterness, even if justified, has no benefit, and won't save a single child. Educating the children is clearly effective, needs to be done more widely, and should be carried out in print, broadcast, and didactic manners.
ReplyDeleteBracha has done a great service to the klal.
There truly is progress on other fronts, though admittedly is too slow. The sour grapes that characterizes too much of the discussion is shameful, and does nothing to protect children. This brief article by Bracha does accomplish.
I don't think I could understand this as a warning from sexual abuse if I were a child.
ReplyDeleteI would suddenly ask myself whether it is OK to go swimming in a bathing suit. That's what it seems to mean...
...but anyway, I do think that the issue of preventing sexual abuse is very, very complex.
ReplyDeleteSexual abuse happens on chassidic girls who learned never even to talk to a man, let alont undress in front of him, let alone have sexual intercourse: it is very much a question of power and abuse of power.
I don't think that this well-meaning ad-campaign will do anything to help...
Shoteh, the charges don't have to be proven. Raglayim Ladavor is sufficient. Also, when the victim himself is doing the reporting, how can you tell them that the charges are unproven? According to you, a child molester can never be reported unless he performs his despicable acts in front of two kosher witnesses. The way you pervert the halacha is what has led us to the sorry state we are in. As for teaching kids about "good touch, bad touch", yes, it is important for them to be aware. However, this will not deter the molesters. They are not afraid of your pamphlets. The only thing they fear is hard jail time.
ReplyDeleteI'm no spokesman, but Agudah has no position on this. There is a criteria of raglayim ledovor, as is mentioned in all the teshuvos, including that of Rav Elyashiv. It does not say that this determination must be made by a Rav. However, inasmuch as the outcome of the determination is the implementation of a halacha, which is a double edge sword, no one sees another way. No, you do not need kosher witnesses to make a complaint. You might need that to pasken. The issue here is not a bais din ruling on the molestation charge; it is the permitting of the next step to go to secular courts. While not a simple matter, there is a dire need for some conclusion on this. The touting of the "mesira" line is clearly being abused in the name of "holiness", which has disastrous effects.
ReplyDeleteIt sounds unfair to tell the poskim to produce a psak that states that reporting should always be permitted (leaving them with an a priori psak to then justify), but that is what we have been doing. It is sometimes about protecting the alleged perpetrator, but that can be suggested for specific cases, not the general shailoh.
When will this uncertainty end?
To We Need Clarity,
ReplyDeleteI just don't see a problem with wanting a blanket psak for people to go straight to the police on the matter of child molestation.
If a child says something happened, take him to a social worker at CPS and let them help you decide if it requires reporting. If the secular people say, yes, this is child molestation, then file an official report.
What are you asking from the rabbonim? That they should become social workers, investigators, and child sexual abuse experts? Do we call in the rabbonim on a rape case? I should hope we take the rape victim straight to the hospital, even if the rapist was her father,brother,or uncle. There is no shailah here, child molestation is complex and it is not for the rabbonim to deal with.
What the rabbonim should be doing is encouraging any and all victims to come forward when there is a case pending against a suspected pedophile.