Important women - perception or reality?

Igros Moshe(O.C. 5:20): …The Beis Yosef brings the Ri in the name of Tosfos that all of our women are important and therefore need to recline at the Seder. (The Bach raises the question according to the view of Rashbam that women don’t recline because the fear of their husbands is supposed to be upon them – and it follow therefore that also important women need to have the fear of their husbands? However I don’t understand his question. Was it really the will and the command of the Sages that the fear of her hsuband exist even for those things which aren’t relevant to him and even when it nullifies a mitzva? Furthermore it is not good that the husband be so fussy about this wife. We see that for many hundreds of years that husband have not been concerned about requiring this as we see in the Beis Yosef who brings the Ri in the name of Tosfos – and he states that all of our women are important and need to recline at the Seder. Also the Mordechai brings this view. In addition it can’t be understood that all these women objectively became important - so that the husband needs to honor them even according to the rules of secular society. Obviously it was because the husbands came to recognize over time that they have no reason to feel superior to their wives. And similarly the wives recognized the great need that the men have for them. The small amount of genuinely important woman that have been found in all ages were those that the husband perceived their superiority – just as they had need for their husbands. They recognized that even their husbands knew this)