https://time.com/article/2026/08/29/therapy-has-a-relationship-problem/
Psychotherapy itself is predicated upon the healing power of human connection, yet therapists can be surprisingly quick to undervalue relationships outside the therapy room. Furthermore, relationships themselves teach basic psychological capacities such as regulating emotions, tolerating disappointment, and negotiating differences—skills which therapy is supposed to cultivate.
Too often, we mistake relational distress for relational dysfunction. Wall Street Journal columnist Elizabeth Bernstein recently highlighted this eloquently. She reported on therapists who encouraged adult children to go “no contact” with their parents, often after surprisingly little effort to mend ruptures. In a survey of roughly 7,000 estranged parents, one-third believed their adult child’s therapist had influenced or even recommended the decision to cut ties. That should give us pause.
The issue extends well beyond parents and children. Similar patterns appear in marriages and among siblings, friendships, and other close bonds. Therapists have become too quick to support ending difficult relationships instead of helping people develop the skills to repair them.
So for the sake of discussion, here's the question I'd ask.
ReplyDeleteLet's say "A" was not your father or mother. You meet "A" randomly or move in the same social circles. You think "A" is okay but often annoying and don't really enjoy conversations with him/her or spending time together.
Or worse, "A" is a bully and you'd rather not be around him/her at all.
Now "A" is a parent. Yes there's tghe biological tie but if the two of you are really that incompatible and "A" has done a lousy job raising you, why continue to be connected?
Because A is your parent. So mayyybe there is still something worthwhile in the relationship and what about gratitude?
ReplyDelete