Wednesday, October 21, 2020

Misconceptions about marriage - a wife is not a shtender

 Steipler The Steipler told fathers to look for 3 qualities in a son in law1 intelligence, diligence (hasmoda) and character (midos)One father objected saying there was no need for the third since all talmidei chachomim have midos.The Steipler responded “A wife is not a shtender!” after many years in yeshiva a bachor learns to relate properly to his shtender and gemora but not to a request to take out the garbage or who needs attention d character to put up with a sick wife a sick child to sleep. For that you need good character

9 comments:

  1. Prof Chimen Abramsky was an atheist and Marxist, and hsi daughter married out. he was the son of Dayan Abramsky ztl. An english rabbi, R' Jeremy Rosen was visiting Dayab Abramsky in Jerusalem , and he was learning Gemara with a man who was bareheaded. He later on realised this was his son, Chimen!

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  2. it is just a vort - even the greatest and frummest have no guarantees that their offspring will follow in their path. Also it shows something strange about the son - he even refuse to cover his head when sitting with his father and learning gemara.

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  3. this is news to you?!
    Why the need to write a comment about it and what relevance does it have to the post?

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  4. The post mentions shtender and gemora. Hence it's relating to character and gemora. Do you prefer it but to be mentioned?

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  5. intelligence, diligence (hasmoda) and character (midos)


    Professor abramsky certainly had the intelligence. But he lacked the midos. (Hence not even wearing a kappa in his father's house) I thought that very drum people cut off their otd children, or is that only if they intermarried?

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  6. contrary to your understanding it is much more varied

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  7. there is a story, I think from the Professor's grandson, that when he died, he was holding a chumash in his hand. This was an atheist-marxist. Perhaps he did teshuva, and this is what his wise father ztl was hoping for.

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